best things in life.

Hello people! To be honest,the picture above I actually got it from peipei's blog. I m not a stalker,ok? Just thought the picture is,nice.

Still have 1 zuowen to do before i can slack. Sian.

Woke up at 10 this morning,cos i slept at 1 yesterday. I was watching privileged! Really nice drama can? I know you must be thinking why stay until so late to watch a drama when u can directly watch it on youtube or something? Well,my answer is because I like it. Cannot meh.

Actually suppose to go out on a study date with hillary and jiarong and maybe hiddy today,but unfortunately I have to babysit my sis cos i have absolutely no idea where my dad went ever since i woke up this morning.

School is starting tomorrow. I'm so dead. I HATE SCHOOL. GRR.

Sec 3 life is stressing me out. Everyone agrees to that fact. What's going to happen if i am sec 4? I seriously can't imagine.

But 304 isn't as boring as it was. Cos of charmaine poh who sits behind me and dave chan. Cos of them i am having fun. Me & charmaine poh always gang dave by kidnapping his bag and pencil case etc. super fun+funny! kept on laughing and laughing during classes. I am glad in my sit now.

Charmaine poh is a really nice person who helps me out A LOT. just like in old times,i rely on weiting. now,i rely on charmaine poh :) but sometimes both of us got the fact wrong when everyone got it right. then we would laugh to ourselves for being foolish. haha. deep in my heart, i want to thank charmaine poh and dave for making me enjoy classes. THANK YOU. although i know both of you won't be reading this (you might not even know i have a blog),but still, yeah. thank you. :D

can we get back to square 1? i suddenly want to talk to you like last time. i don't want to admit but i miss you.

doing homework now while chatting with minshi on msn. :D
homework are stacking up in piles! SUFFOCATING.

suddenly thought of something mr liu said during maths lesson.
M L F C
Mr Liu Fan Club
haha. actually it stand for
M- mathematical set
L- long ruler
F- flexi curve
C- calculator
this is the method to remind us what to bring for maths tests or exams.

suddenly thought of sharmaine fan club. cos according to sharmaine,i m the president of her fan club. -.- haha!

Shall never ever change myself so that I could fit into the group. Friends accept you for who you are. Not accept you the way they want you to be. Then in this case, they will not be called friends anymore. Now I realise, it's quite true that people of the same type hang out with each other,cos only people of the same kind could feel the same way that you feel. You can't force yourself to feel the same way as others. That will be so wrong. Now I really hate the feeling of being the extra one.
I REPEAT: I WILL NEVER EVER CHANGE MYSELF JUST SO MY FRIENDS WILL LIKE ME. FRIENDS WILL LIKE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE. NOT WHO THEY WANT YOU TO BE.
shall never do that ever again.

p.s.: i'm going to taiwan for immersion programme! :)

So you are going to treat me like that? I'm not a pushover,i tell you. Since you treated me like that, I will treat you the same way back.

I sound so evil. But obviously I am such a nice person,right?
AGREED.

Sometimes small things could determine how much you meant to your friends.

Hello. To speak the truth, I am to tired to smile already.
Supposely going to Charmaine's house today to learn the new songs,but she suddenly can't make it. Shall depend on myself to learn the song.
byebye
Did all my homework because i thought today i was going out. Begged my parents so i could go out. For nothing.
did finish all my homework for nothing. begged my parents for nothing.It's ok. When it's not. It really hurts.
I tell you it's ok when it's not cos i don't want you to worry. But other than saying it's ok,wat else shld i say? Say that it's not ok,i am angry,i am frustrated,i am upset,i am fed up? And after that expect you to feel guilty so i could feel better? I couldn't do such a thing to hurt my friend. But have you ever thought that you are hurting me? You think I will not know where you are going? It's all written in your blog. I don't blame you,but i just felt that it's not worth it. I treat you as a really good friend but now then i realise to you,i am not UR good friend. It's obvious,you know. You say that i did not sms you about my new number,but i could swear that i did. I m not very angry about this, but knowing that you are not the first person who ask me i change phone number is it? it hurts me. it proves only one thing. i am not ur friend as i thought you were mine. first is songlin, then now it's you. i thought songlin is the only person tat's why i was only angry with him. but now,you too. now i am not angry anymore,just feeling upset. m i really not tat worthy?

friends are always there for you,no matter what happens.♥

Hello people!
Today is a sat. Supposely to go on a study date with minshi and jinnyuan. Then this morning szelim n songlin sms me that they can go. But sadly,I cannot go. :( Cos i failed my maths level test so I am banned from going out on weekends. I hope i can still go charmaine's house 2moro to learn the new song. Shall beg my parents. Hahaha.
Nothing to blog today except for the fact that i got lots of homework and lots of test to revise.
My test schedule: Week 4-- 1. Physics Class Test
2. English Class Test (compo. i m so dead.)
Week 5-- 1. Chinese Class Test
2. SS Class Test
3. E Geog Test
See? Sigh. Sec 3 is so stressful. Sigh sigh sigh...
Tat's all for today.
byebye

Tag replies:
Peipei: Hi Jieling! ;D your happiness will come to you, one day. Take your time to choose. XD . So stay happy and smile!
Jaslyn: See i so nice come tag youuu! hahaha, dont give up blogging laa! (:
Martin: haha ya same. 3rd week only got tons of homework and tests
weiting: )):
weiting: i reach school early today lor

@Peipei: Haha. Thanks! I hope you will be happy as well!
@Jaslyn: Bleh.You very nice then i am super duper nice de. haha.I won't give up blogging de lah.
@Martin: Me too! Sec 3 is so different from sec 2 de lor. Cannot slack le. :(
@Weiting: Got meh? then i never see you. maybe u go do duty le. haha. :)

it hurts being too close to you.

hello people! just got back from school. still in my school uniform cos i lazy change. Never knew i could be so lazy,right? heehee.
today when alighting the bus the sky was super dark lor. i thought i was early then i see the time was already 7.02 am. bleh. reached school exactly before it started raining. *glad*
nothing to do when i reached my class room. no one to chat with. then i went up to the 5th floor to look for sharmaine and maybe hoping to see weiting but obviously she is always later than me to reach sch. sharmaine wasn't in class but just then,edeline came. woo-hoo! super glad to see her de. then we sharmaine came up from the stairs and steph came too. then we 4 stood at one corner and talked about stuffs until the bell rang then i quickly ran down to my class to see ms saw already in the classroom le. slowly walked through the back door,with all the tall people blocking me and suddenly appearing at my seat,haha. (cos ms saw don't like people to go by the back door,so must crept into the classroom. haha.)
eng was boring,but i managed not to sleep. I m so pro! :)
E geog learnt about calculating gradient for slopes, caught it very quickly cos it was easy for me :) miss nornie is super funny de, she likes people to praise her de then she will be super happy and so nice that she gave us an early recess. HAHA. this is one thing she said during the last geog lesson:

Miss Nornie: I like to have all your attentions ok? Cos I'm a attention-seeker.

Ekkheng: If Beyonce stands beside you lei?

Miss Nornie: So what you see Beyonce? If Beyonce stand beside me, you people must still put your attention to me! *smiles to herself*

Class: BURST OUT TO LAUGHTER.

Recess went to eat with 205 girls, then got back to class it
was SS. sian! Learnt about dunno what governence. wth.

then was chinese, had spelling and i got full marks! haha :D

Lunch went to 308,supposely to find weiting de,but she got duty,so i went with edeline dear and went to different classes to find 205 people. though it was just a short meeting with 205 people,but it was enough to make me happy and hang on through the rest of the day in that class of mine. I was really hoping for school to end. so soon as possible.

After lunch was maths,went to class to find mr liu already in the classroom. Surprised. Cos i wasn't late or something and he was super early. then people asked him why you so early come to class? then he replied to say this is my form class lei,why i cannot come early meh? Weird. Anyway,maths was surprisingly ok for me today. Did not get stuck at the questions. :D

After school, I and charmaine went to find yifeng for the planning of nanhua idol. sian. me did nothing at all. cos they weren't listening. -.- i hate it when you talk and no one is listening. nvm. charmaine n me went off at 4.45 n me waited with charmaine for her mum to come n fetch her.charmaine went off in her car n then i realised her car's licence number was 2288. cool number.

went home alone on 198 and i nearly slept through my bus stop. lucky i woke up in time. it felt great to be alone when going home. but it sure doesn't feel good when you are alone in school.

well,sunday i am going to charmaine's house to learnt new song given yesterday. sian. tat's all for today.

byebye :)

she was right. it was not that i was not willing to let go of him,but just that i haven found the person who can let me let go of him. Not yet.

You can clutch to the past so tightly that your arms are too full to embrace the present.

Hey people! Today was a really tiring day for me. Glad that I made through it.
Reached school and went to the usual place where Sharmaine & YingYing always sit. Outside the old 105 classroom. Miss those times we spent in that particular classroom with the special people which makes it so special. As usual, we were laughing like hell shit every morning lah. Cos of Sharmaine,the lame queen. :D Me & Yingying were like going to laugh our heads out cos we realise we laugh the same way cos we will move up and down,up and down. Like as though banging your head on something and you can't stop banging our head. MUAHAHA.
Kina was, as usual, having the blur blur look on her face as me & yingying laugh like siaozarbors.
Guess it's the only time when I can laugh like that.
Yingzhen didn't come today. As expected. During PE I was like super lonely. Stupid game we played and I kept losing. Might as well die. On the verge of crying le. Then went down to canteen and found the 205 girls there eating. Sat with them thinking about stuffs which I know is already too late. Got back to class and was Biology. Had practical session. Sat at the same table which me,fione,sharmaine n shannon used to sit together during practical sessions and remembered of the times I was laughing cos of Sharmaine's expression. Now the people sitting with me weren't the same people I sat with before. Complexed feelings.
Chemistry a new teacher came in. Makes no difference for me cos I always study on my own. But new teacher was so ok lah.
Lunch was the happiest time of the day. Weiting came to my class to wait for me then we went to eat lunch together. Then when the bell rang I suddenly remembered I needed to hand up Bio worksheets to Ms Saw so I dashed up to class leaving Weiting behind. haha. Sorry weiting!
Eng was the last 2 periods and we got our Eng file. Purple. -.-
Got all the stuffs about rubrics of marking scheme and you know, blah blah.
Lesson finally dismiss le then quickly went to music room to put bag then went to find Ms Saw again to give her some worksheets. I was like standing in front of the glass door but I can't see her. Then i called her then I saw her sitting in her chair sliding out of her compartment which was just 2 compartments in front of me. SO STUPID RIGHT.
Then went to canteen to find sharmaine and brought things up the music room to eat.
Choir started and Mr Poh came super early today. 2 more sec 1s came to audition. *happy*
Sang the song Sunset again but Sop 2s was stuck on the 1st page. Like omg. Then Ms Yin came and she was happy. :) Did warm ups again and I was sleeping while standing and singing. So pro right? No lah,I was so tired that my eyes keep dropping and can't even lift my cheekbones lah. Then Ms Yin saw the Sop 2s so tired and then asked us to sit and then we requested(to be exact,is me & juewen.haha. huishan was huh...-ing when we said to go for a run) to go for a run. So hardworking right? Cos I seriously need to wake myself up before I can sing properly lor. Definitely don't want to faint while in choir. Hahas. Sang until the end of page 3 before we were dismissed, ms yin purposely let us off early cos the new principal set the new rule that the back gate will be closed at 6pm. Like shit lor, stupid new principal. Still must tuck in PE shirt somemore. I miss Dr Foo.
Went home with weiting and now I am here blogging.
Tomorrow's going to be another day. Sigh...

First, congrats to peipei who found her other half. hope they will last long.
Second, No one is tagging. Thus I also don't have the effort to blog le.

Now I realise I was always alone. The lies I made up to comfort myself are running out. Someone provide me with lies that I never thought of before? Happiness never once belonged to me. Even if they did belonged to me, it was never long lasting. How much i wished for long lasting happiness that belonged to me.

memories are fading,but the feeling is still there.

Hello people! As you can see, I just changed my blogskin. Nice? Some comments please :)
This morning was feeling bored so went to my blog and realised that it's time for a change, and since I have nothing better to do, I searched for new blogskins. Took me 2 hours to complete this! But I am still quite satisfied with the results. :D

Still left with 1 homework before I could slack. Chinese 剪报. SIAN. Then after that still have to revise for Physics test next week! Gosh, only the 3rd week of school, then tests are already coming my way. And Physics is propably the worst subject for me. Currently. NOT SURE OF SS. I bet I can Never get a distinction for SS. Unless there is miracles. Which is not very likely for me. -.-

Actually today was supposed to be a lunch outing with minshi & jinnyuan & szelim & maybe songlin. But today minshi & I couldn't make it so in the end, we cancelled the outing. Minshi had lots of homework (which was predictable,since we are alr sec 3), and I have to stay at home to take care of my sis since dad is working today. D; I WAS ACTUALLY REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO THE OUTING! SAD. ):

Today my sis did a thing which made me really angry. SHE CUTTED MY HAIR!!! WTH. I bet you must be laughing at me in front of the computer. SO STOP IT. My sis actually cut my hair while I was busy changing my blogskin and suddenly I felt someone touching me and I turned around to see a few strands(or maybe a bundle) of MY hair on the floor. I was freaking mad lah! Then I confiscated her scissors. All she did was quietly laughing to herself. WAT THE HELL?!

GRRR. Stop laughing already,will you? -.-

btw, Fallin' For You by Colbie Caillat is really nice. The MV is hilarious yet romantic. :)

thinking of you again. i wonder why but i start writing your name every whr with my fingers.

I keep missing you for reasons i can't explain.

hello to everyone:)
today is another fri n as u know, i went to singapore river to pick up litter.
but we were not exactly picking up litters, more look like sight-seeing under the big sun.haha.
i guess my grp only picked up 2 cigeratte butts and a piece of used tissue. -.-
back to sch at around 12.15pm then was lunch till 1pm. couldn't find amelia and weiting was having OC camp. then ate with kina n ying zhen ppl. realised tat i was really different from them.
back to class n did some reflections about today's activity. sian.
then used the remaining time to talk about the design of class tees but only decided on the colour n material only. dri-fi & red as base colour. sue mae seemed like having a tough time. suddenly thought of how tough it was for jean to decide on the class tee for sec 1 n sec 2.
sch dismissed n went home with justin n baocai.
boring day for me. another boring week ahead of me since yingzhen will not be here for at least 4 days. :( feel like crying le.
raining outside now. feel like sleeping.
2moro's plan for watching movies was cancelled. D:
cos too few ppl going,n then we decided to just have lunch together.
SAD. D;
byebye

looking at you reminds me of him. the thought of him makes me miss him. been missing him more than usual these few days. shit.

tears explained words i can't say. tears could be my reason.

hello ppl! I have to admit, sec 3 life is really very stressful and tiring! No doubt about it.

Yesterday was choir and it was Ms Yin's 20+ (confidential) birthday!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY :D
Yesterday the sec 1s came for audition too,woo. out of 28 ppl,only 18 can join. BUT THE IMPORTANT THING IS,OUT OF THE 18 PPL,3 ARE GUYS!!! LIKE FINALLY? NOW WE CAN HAVE TENOR! WOO-HOO!
Learnt a new song,which is a set piece for SYF 2005. It was called Sunset. I'M SO GLAD THAT WE DIDN'T HAVE THAT SONG AS OUR SET PIECE. PHEW. Tough song indeed! Not as nice as White Horses,though. Heehee.
On the bus this morning,i was chatting with minshi. Had a really nice conversation which lightened my day. Haha. Deciding to go watch movie together on this Sat. Songlin wanted to watch Avatar, but me and minshi thought the aliens were super ugly. According to minshi, it's the 'green green thing'. Hahas. So we decided to watch Tooth Fairy instead. Watched the trailer,super funny! Haha,i can't wait! :D
The last time i saw minshi was like a few hundred years ago. So sad. And minshi agrees with me. Haha.
Reached school, feeling like THIS IS IT. As though i am going for an exam or something. In case you haven been reading my blog, i hate 304. Everyday going to school was like a tough thing for me. Unlike being in 205,i always look forward to going to school. But apparently, now it's not the case.
Everyday when i was on the bus home,i felt SO RELIEVED. You can never imagine how relieved i was.
Went out with sharmaine & steph today after school,actually hoping to eat lunch together. (sharmaine was like super lame. you cannot imagine.)But upon reaching city vibe. I was suddenly craving for chicken rice. Haha. Then brought chicken rice and went home with steph.
You cannot imagine how happy i was when i am spending time with 205 ppl.
Doing Bio homework now, still have lots haven do yet.
Tomorrow going to release school early, at 10.30 am! cos the last year sec4s did a good job and thus we are benefitting. :D
Fri is CIP day, going to Singapore River to pick up rubbish. wth.
Sat going out with minshi and ppl. Hahaha! :DDD
my schedule for the next couple of days. ta-da!
byebye

irritating people.stop talking to me.

i hate it when you gave me hope again. why are you talking to me?! i thought the feeling end already. but why, do you come to talk to me and gave me hope again? now,i have to start all over again to forget you. do you know how tough it is? Cos you are not the one hurt always. Unfair.

Hello ppl. Apparently no one's been coming to my blog cos i don't see ppl tagging.(although i oso dun tag when i go other ppl's blog.) btw, wat's wrong with shannon? fight on? wat the hell? nvm.

Just finished half of my chinese homework. Shall continue with the other half tomorrow maybe.
My Physics sucks like shit lah can or not. I can't even read zero error. Failure. I don't know how to convert the measurements too. Big Failure.
Apart from Physics, Biology is the next tough subject for me. Like WAT THE HELL. Mitochrondria? Endoplasmic Reticulum? Ribosomes? Sorry, I want to sleep liao lor.
Then is Social Studies. I thought I can never touch History related stuff ever again when I am Sec 3. But fat hope for me. SS is no difference from History can or not. wth. Source-based questions are so going to kill me. Might as well I kill myself first. Gun please. -.-
Chemistry. Wat the hell is that lah. Writing Chemical Equations= 0 mark
A Maths I am still coping well lah. Liu gong kai's going to come back from reservice le. Next Week.
E Geog is ms nornie. Shall see how things goes first.
304 sucks like hell. I seriously miss 205 to the core.
As if I am going to have any friends other than 205 de 4 ppl. Gregory shall not be included since he doesn't wants to belong to 205. 304 is so un-fun. Cool ppl=Hostile ppl.

Just read Charmaine's blog. I guess I can understand some of her unhappiness. But I still envy her. At least she has friends in her class. Friends. Tough thing.

I suddenly miss minshi. miss amelia n weiting too. I guess I won't have any best friends in 304 for 2 years. Suffering. I didn't know making friends could be so hard.
I shall be anti-social in 304. New thing for me cos i have never been this anti-social before in 14 years. Now I am super scared of having group work or group discussion cos no one would want to group with a anti-social person like me. Obviously.

Who will understand. I feel so empty. Now i totally hate school. Now i feel vulgar. wtf.